Am I really going to blog?: Just another boring update!

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Just another boring update!

Haven't felt great the last few days. Mostly just blah. Weary.

Kind of matches my mood. Cameron's 14th birthday was Sunday. I spent the day feeling sorry for myself. Would have drank some wine if I had the energy to open it up.

Updates:

1. Run/jog/walk 1000 miles. Current status: 121.2/1000. I am still WAY behind on this goal!

2. Current Status: 10/100

Finished reading Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn. I liked this book way better than the other one. The characters were not as well developed as I would have liked, but at least I could follow this story.

Also read Asylum (The Birch Harbor Series) by Kristen Selleck. Totally not my kind of book. A young adult, super natural book. It was ok.

Not sure what is up next. Guess when I grab my kindle tonight, whatever looks good on the 1st screen will win!

3. Lose 25 pounds. Current status: 6.4/25. The scales went the wrong way last week, so I had ground to make up! Still on target with this goal though.

4. Get more organized. No progress this week.

5. Make one new recipe per week. Current status: 9/52

Made these:

http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Roasted-Asparagus-365157

and this for dinner last weekend:

http://www.ducksnarow.com/2012/10/classic-apple-crisp-recipe.html

Both were successes & will find their way into the dinner rotation.

Until next time (& hopefully it will be more interesting),
Lori

2 comments:

runs with boxersMarch 7, 2013 at 8:10 PM
If I could take some of your heartbreak away, I would...or I could just help you open the wine bottles...
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TraceyMarch 10, 2013 at 10:26 AM
Birthdays are tough days, and you do what you need to do to get through them. Hope you're feeling Cameron close to you these days!
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I HOPE....

I hope you never have to hear the words, 'Your child has cancer.'

I hope you never have to hear, 'The prognosis is not good.'

I hope you never have to prepare to undergo radiation or chemotherapy, have a port surgically inserted into their chest, be connected to IV poles. Look at you with fear in their eyes and say, 'Don't worry Mommy, everything will be okay.'

I hope you never have to hold your child as they vomit green bile.

I hope you never have to feed them ice chips for lunch.

I hope you never have to watch the 'cure' you pray for slowly take away their identity, as they lose their hair, become skeletal, swell up from steroids, develop severe acne, become barely or unable to walk or move, and look at you with hope in their eyes and say,'It's going to be okay, Mommy.'

I hope that you never have to stay in the hospital for weeks, months, or years at a time, where there is no privacy, sleeping on a slab, with your face to the wall, where you cry in muffled silence.

I hope you never have to see a mother, alone, huddled, in a dark hospital corridor...crying quietly, after just being told, 'There is nothing more we can do.'

I hope you never have to watch a family wander aimlessly, minutes after their child's body has been removed.

I hope you never have to use every bit of energy you have left, with all of this going on around you to remain positive, and the feelings of guilt, sorrow, hope and fear, overwhelm you.

I hope you never have to see a child's head bolted to the table as they receive radiation.

I hope you never have to take your child home (grateful but so afraid) in a wheelchair because the chemo and radiation has damaged their muscles, 35 pounds lighter, pale, bald, and scarred. And they look at you with faith in their eyes and say, 'It's going to be okay Mommy.'

I hope you never have to face the few friends that have stuck beside you and hear them say, 'Thank God that is over with,'...because you know it never will be. Your life becomes a whirl of doctors, blood tests and MRI's and you try to get your life back to 'normal'. While living in mind-numbing fear that any one of those tests could result in hearing the dreaded words...'The cancer has returned' or 'The tumor is growing.' And your friends become even fewer.

I hope you never have to experience any of these things... Because...only then...Will you understand...

(author unknown)