So friends....

I've not been myself. Kind of down, worried. Expecting the worst.

All because of a letter. A form letter in fact. The kind of form letter that doesn't even have a copied signature. Just some random guys name typed at the bottom.

So, my letter said that my recent mammogram "shows a finding that requires additional imaging studies. You should call your doctor to have an appointment scheduled for complete evaluation of this finding if you have not already done so."

Um.... how would I have done so when I just not got your freaking letter???? At 6 PM. So, I get to worry and stew and cry all night. Imaging all of the worst things. Wishing I could just talk to my mom.

So, first thing in the morning I tried calling my doctor. He was in surgery all morning. Left messages for the nurse to call me back. Every hour. She never called.

So, I tried calling the radiologist whose name was typed on the bottom of my letter. He, conveniently, was not taking calls that day. Seriously? Is that an option?

So, I tried calling the Women's Center where the original mammogram was done. Guess what? They don't know anything.

In desperation, I called Riverside Hospital's Breast Health Center in Columbus. I have never been a patient there, but I've heard good things about them. So, why not? No one else will talk to me, what is one more rejection?

Guess what? Polly talked to me. She had me sign a release & fax it to her. She got a copy of my report and shared it with me ("something" on the far right side of the right breast). She scheduled me for a compression mammogram (not sure how that is different from a regular one), ultrasound and consult with the doctor on Tuesday. She promised me that I would not leave there without an answer. Bless her heart. She may have single-handedly prevented an absolute breakdown just by talking with me.

So, poor sleep and an active imagination have made for a fragile me. But I only have to get through a few more days. Good thing I am medicated.

I will update again when I have something more to say. Positive thoughts & prayers are appreciated!

Lori

48 years ago today....

my parents got married.

Can't find their wedding photo on this computer, so a pic from the 70s will have to do.

Boring updates.....

Updates

1. Run/jog/walk 1000 miles. Current status: 347.28/1000.

Still behind, but catching up. It is so hard to work in 2.74 miles EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. This leaves me very little time for cross-training which I know I am going to pay for in the long-run. Need to work on finding a better balance.

2. Read 100 books. Current Status: 23/100

Since the last update I have read: Need to Breathe by Tara Staley; Stretch Marks: A Novel by Kimberly Stuart; Sunflowers by Melodie Starkey; Absence of Grace by Ann Warner; Growing from Depression by Neel Burton; Unfriend Yourself: Three Days to Detox, Discern, and Decide About Social Media; Jane Rochester: A Novel Inspired by Charlotte Bronte's Jane Eyre by Kimberly A. Bennett; & Miracles: 32 True Stories by Joanie Hileman.

YIKES! I am way behind (should be at 38 books down right now!). It feels like I am reading A LOT but not getting anywhere!

3. Lose 25 pounds. No comment.

4. Get more organized. No comment

5. Make one new recipe per week. Current status: 20/52

 

Doing ok here. Made yummy French toast using French Vanilla coffee creamer - Thanks to Krogers for that idea! Have also made random side dishes - roasted tomatoes with olive oil and parmesan cheese, breakfast smoothie with almond milk, frozen banana, black berries, Greek yogurt and 6 almonds; fudgy brownies with cream cheese swirls. My favorite (& new regular is this: http://foodpicsgo.com/?p=1618).

 

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Otherwise, life is just busy!  Will try to do a more interesting update soon!

 

Until next time,

Lori

Running Anniversary

This upcoming weekend is the 3 year anniversary of my "running."

Those who know me well know that I use the term "running" lightly. I move/shuffle along on either the bike path by my work or on a treadmill. I am not fast. But, I do have stamina and sheer determination to just keep on going. Part of why I keep on going is the running community has made me feel very welcomed and you never know what you are going to see out there! And I have seen a lot (too much really!) - everything from a man getting chest compressions to bare naked behinds. Seriously. Better than TV most days!

In these 3 years I have logged literally thousands of miles. That is astounding to me. I am a couch potato who does not like to sweat. But, I have come to embrace it! I have completed countless 5Ks (though I probably could count all those t-shirts!), 3 10Ks and 4 half marathons! Holy Cow! I have also spent $$$$$$$$$$ on shoes, clothes (sports bras are pricey!), entry fees and photos. All worth it!

I prefer running to a team sport. Out there, it is all me. I can only depend on myself to get there and back. Also, no one is depending on me, so if I am having a bad day, it is ok.

Recently, I was lunching with my family at our local Olive Garden when a waiter approached, pointed at my shirt and said "Hey, how did you do?" At first, I was confused, but then I realized that I was wearing my 2013 Athens Half Marathon shirt. We chatted for a few minutes about the course, the great weather that day and our various injuries. Another reminder that the running community is real and accepting, even of a middle-aged over-weight woman!



Photos from the 2013 Athens Half Marathon!

 

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While perusing on-line I came across this article & it made me laugh at loud!

9 Reasons Running Doesn't Suck as Much as You Think

1. You can lose weight by drinking nothing but hot water with lemon OR you can run for an hour, treat yourself to a cookie and still fit into your skinny jeans! One of these options makes you bitchy. The other makes you rad.
2. Take your iPod with you and runs suddenly become a safe place to indulge your love of boy-band music. :)
3. When your boss, your melodramatic friend and your nagging to-do list won’t leave you alone, calmly put on your running shoes and head out the door. They won’t follow you. It’s a safer alternative to storming out with both middle fingers in the air (though you can -and should- still do this in your head, just for spectacular effect).
4. You’ll discover lululemon pants are good for more than just buying tampons and Cheez-its at Target (I know, ladies. My world was rocked with that discovery, too.).
5. Running is the last place you have to “be a lady.” Sweat, snot and sneaking behind a bush to pee is not only liberating it’s fun, in that giggly-childish-naughty kind of way.
6. Getting a run in before happy hour means you get tipsy on half a glass of wine instead of your usual two. That’s not being a lush, that’s just sound economic planning!
7. Studies have shown that runners have better sex. Sex counts as a cross-training workout, which in turn makes you a better runner, which – hello! – leads to even better sex. Really, the whole thing is full of win-wins.
8. Girls are lucky; there’s an entire industry committed to making us look awesome while getting our sweat on. Workout clothes come in all sorts of cool colors and designs. Jockstraps, on the other hand, will always be ugly with questionable stains....
9. Non-runners will sit on the couch and call you crazy. Those folks, sadly, will never learn what their bodies are capable of. You, on the other hand, will die knowing you completely, totally, unabashedly used up the body that was loaned to you. That’s not crazy. That’s freakin’ awesome!

Easter 2013

Sami posing it up before we left for church on Easter morning.

 

 

 During church service, as typical for Easter, there was a lot of talk about blood. Part way through, Sami whispered to me: "What blood type did Jesus have?"

Good question.

After attempting to explain that they probably didn't even know that there were different blood types at that time & that they wouldn't have had the technology to test, my response was: "I bet he was O-, the Universal Donor."

Her questions get harder & harder!



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Updates:

1. Run/jog/walk 1000 miles. Current status: 199.4/1000.

Strained my calf last week so I took it easy. Did some walking, but not much running.

2. Read 100 books. Current Status: 18/100

This week I have read:

* 99 Foods That Speed Up Your Metabolism And Help You Lose Weight by Scott Walker;

* What the Hell was I Thinking? A Memoir by Emma Feix Alberts &

* What If? Changing Your Life to Fit Your Truth by Jim Young.

  

3. Lose 25 pounds. Current status: 5.4/25.

Oops. Too much Easter dinner for me.

4. Get more organized. No comment

5. Make one new recipe per week. Current status: 13/52

Made the Bunny cake.





Until next time,
Lori

An apology & some updates

So, I had an email exchange with the reporter about the Flashes of Hope article & I came away from it feeling ok (used, but ok). She initially apologized for disappointing me, which showed me that she really didn't get what I was trying to say. Normally, I am not very good at self-advocacy, but in this case, I really didn't let it go until I felt like she was hearing what I had to say. I felt emotionally exploited and that made me angry. At the end of it, I think I got my point across and no longer feel the need to completely boycott The Dispatch.


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Updates:

1. Run/jog/walk 1000 miles. Current status: 182.59/1000.

Two weeks in a row I have been over my weekly mileage goal - 20 more weeks like this & I am caught up! But I don't know how many more 28+ mileage weeks I can handle!

2. Read 100 books. Current Status: 15/100

This week I have read:  My Sister and I: We are Survivors by J. Jackson Owensby; The Truth About Butterflies: A Memoir by Nancy Stephan; Homo sarcasmus - On the Origin of the Species by Heath L. Buckmaster; & The Compass of Pleasure by David Linden

3. Lose 25 pounds. Current status: 6.8/25. Stagnant 2 weeks in a row. Better than going up I suppose & still on track.

4. Get more organized. No comment

5. Make one new recipe per week. Current status: 12/52

Made this for dessert the other night: http://www.kitchenscoop.com/recipes/strawberry-cream-cheese-cobbler YUMMY!

Made this for breakfast on Friday: http://www.myfridgefood.com/viewrecipe.php?recipe=20173 Found the recipe on pinterest where it claimed to have only 56 calories. Well, that is a big fat lie, but it was good and not too un-healthy!May even try it without the peanut butter sometime - just banana & chocolate!

Until next time,
Lori

Really?

I feel like I've been punk'd. You know - the Ashton Kutcher show that was on MTV a while ago that played practical jokes on people?

So yesterday I blogged about Flashes of Hope, my interview, and the emotions that were stirred up in me as a result of talking about the experiences with a complete stranger. A stranger who asked more than just about the photos. She asked about Cameron's diagnosis, when he died, and so on.

I waited in anticipation of the article, in fact, checking for it on-line was the first thing I did this morning. My piece - the piece I stewed over, cried over, worried about - was not there.

Cut due to space issues.

Really? All that upset-ment for NOTHING? It's not like I went looking for attention (like I do here on this blog!), but at least a mention in the article would have made it feel at least worthwhile. But, alas & yet again, I came away with nothing. Thank you Ms. Reporter. Please do not call again.

I've been punk'd.