January 8th

Today's picture was taken in May 2008 in front of my rhododendren bush. I have taken Cameron's picture in front of it's blooms since he could stand.

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10 long weeks today. I'm not sure how this can be. The emotions are still so raw, it feels like yesterday. I am so physically and emotionally exhausted, it feels like a lifetime ago.



I've always felt that Samantha was an "old soul." She makes comments like "when I was the mommy I did......" or "when I had my baby....." It doesn't seem as though she is playing make believe. She feels these prior events. Tonight, I was asking her about her day. She started telling me a long tale about how she and "bubby" played with her toys and watched Wall-E on her dvd player. She said "grandma was here for a minute but then she had to go." I want to ask so many questions, but I don't want to steer or influence her experiences. She is not at all troubled by them. They seem perfectly normal to her. I have to admit I am jealous. I wish I had them too.


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Tonight, we are asking for prayers for our friend Matthew. His caringbridge site is: http://caringbridge.org/visit/matthewbarr He had a bone marrow transplant this summer. We were in the hospital at many of the same times. He has to have an MRI next week to get more information about a new spot in his brain. We are praying this is nothing bad.

Until next time
Lori